I’ve been struggling a lot with productivity (or lack of). Lethargy. Unmotivatedness. Plainly tired. Not tired for any particular reason but just tired. And also tired of being tired. Lack of physical activity can be attributed to lower energy levels but even the urge to actually be productive, I can’t seem to find. Maybe I misplaced it underneath hours of undergrad work and crazy schedules. Or maybe the 2020 vibes have gotten to me. Either way, I’m just not feeling like doing anything lately. I usually bribe myself to get work done but even that isn’t working.
I’m currently in my bed, its 2am and I have laundry to put away, chores that I postponed till the morning and work I’ve rescheduled. And its not because I’m sad or anything. Quite the opposite, I’m really doing very well emotionally. I’m just not in the mood for anything. Constantly putting off tasks and it’s not even funny anymore.
I’ve been pep talking myself tho. Since I don’t have anyone to ginger me like my friends used to do in school, I have been burdened with that responsibility.
“What’s the problem. Come on, let’s do this. Don’t you want to do it? Of course you do. Come on, let’s go”.
Over and over again it’s a battle between doing and dozing. (I might probably even doze off before the end of this post, we’ll see).
Anyways, what’s even the point of all this rants. Tbh, I almost forgot what I was trying to say. I think it was along the lines of, I’m trying to change my perspective on things.
Previously I saw everything I did as doing it for me. Either as an investment on myself, a favour for myself or just fun(for myself of course). But tbh, that’s no way to live this life. It’s a bit toxic to be self centered even in the mundane everyday things. So yesterday I was going through Facebook (tbh, social media is currently the bane of my existence, its probably one of the many contributors to my lack of motivation and I really need to take like a 2 month break from it, but that’s a topic for another day)…..yes, I was going through Facebook and i saw this post by ‘daughter of delight’ and it was a bible verse on doing things for the Lord. Let me quote it directly
Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.
Colossians 3:23 NLT
That post really hit me hard. I dont think I’ve ever done stuff and regarded it as though I’m doing it for the Lord, well except maybe church stuff, but I mean like everyday stuff. Chores, work, mundane or super important, all is done having the Lord in mind. Nothing is insignificant to God and he can be glorified in whatever we find ourselves doing. It’s only logical since we were created to give God glory. That’s our purpose at the end of the day.
So, let me wrap this up by saying that I’m writing this verse on my heart. Whenever I feel like not doing something that I know I should be doing (like right now with all my postponed tasks, okay maybe not right now, maybe tomorrow), I’ll put the Lord into the picture and do it for Him. Well technically the Lord is everywhere and he sees all I’m doing so its really in my best interest to accomplish my tasks knowing that he’s there and I’m doing it for Him ultimately. Even though I will benefit from having a completed to do list each day and I will feel happy with myself, it just makes me happy knowing that I’m doing something and God is happy. Not just me all the time. Sounds silly but it’s just something that popped into my head a few minutes before bed and I thought I would share with y’all .
Anyways, hope you have a fantastic week ahead. Stay safe and groovy(I really have no idea how to end my posts now, pls bear with whatever I come up with each week. I’m currently slightly sleep deprived and slightly craving Doritoes. Thanks)
Let’s be friends!